2016-09-06 - 9:02 p.m.

When You Know, But They Don't Know You Know

I'm about to lose one of my jobs.

I'm good at what I do and they'll be hard-pressed to find another like me, but because of a maniacally egocentric big-dog wannabe with an easily hurt butt, I'm about to lose one of my jobs.

I've known it was coming for some time thanks to my company mole, and so, have been waiting and collecting money, and of course always hoping someone may get over themselves and change their wee, little, foot-shooting mind. Today the Program Director sent an email telling me "I need to chat with you later today." Though I made myself available, he has yet to get in touch and now it's after 9 so...axe day must now be tomorrow. Ratings begin on the 8th and it's not standard procedure to make on-air changes during a ratings period...so that's why I'm expecting that the "chat" is indeed the axe call.

This will only be the second time in my life that I've been fired. :)

It's funny that I'm not upset about it. When I first found out it was happening there was a dash of panic. I'm widowed after all, and things haven't been easy...but since Mike died, and even since I first found out that this stream of income was shaky, I've had so many inconceivably ridiculous misfortunes occur that I've gotten rather blasé. I suppose I've just come to realize that nothing at all is within my control. Add a few heaping cups of intense faith and an abundance of marketable skills and confidence that I am a desirable commodity, and you have a girl who sits and sips a little fine bourbon and waits for the axe call.

Hurry up, already. You're wasting my night.

Addendum: I was right. The axe call came the next day. I am employed yet, but only through October 1. I feigned surprise and was ultra gracious, yet still managed to get in a sweetly-disguised dig about how 'very troubled the company must be if this is indeed a "money thing"', as they have claimed it to be. I happen to know for sure that it is actually a "butt-hurt" thing, brought on by an ego monster who doesn't like a contractor making her own rules...but I digress: I lavished sweetness on the OM, who made the call. he was genuinely grieved as I have always easily accepted his instruction and executed his every demand immediately because, why not? I was protecting income ad it made him love me, while all the other employees, who are NOT independent contractors, see it entirely differently as he IS quite a jerk when he implements a directive. This OM, he has control issues and so has approached all these long-standing employees the wrong way, with a "my way or the highway" method. It has not been well received. I knew what I was doing when I cheerfully accepted everything he insisted upon, and it is paying off now: the man doesn't want me gone. he is not the boss, however...but...I went and made it worse. I stepped up my game a little bit more...and my mole has since shown me emails of this man virtually writhing in agony at the prospect of letting me go as I am "the best he has". They are toying with approaching me with cheaper options...which I suspicion may not work, as the REAL reason for my departure has zero to do with money. Money is a nice cover for Chris Z. being a twat. Anyway...I will accept less. No money is bad money and frankly, I've been soaking them for a mothly retainer for two years now...a price originally set when I was up at 5:30 doing a 3 hour live show each day. I've been doing a voice tracked show for that same money for over two years and have been lucky to keep it that high for that long, considering my work for them now takes me a grand total of about 30 minutes per day. We shall see how it shakes out. I hope Mister Butthurt is revealed to be a shallow twat who is implementing stupid change that will hurt the on-air sound and rep of the station, SOLELY because of his ego. It would be good to know that he was exposed that way. or...he may win and get my money. Either way, that firing call was the most empowering thing that I've ever heard, and I look forward to success no matter WHAT happens, because I have the skills necessary to make that money elsewhere. I'll keep...me...posted. haha

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